Keepin it together

Does anyone else feel like they think too much. Stuff just keeps happening to me and I dwell and dwell and try to remember all the details from one day to the next, but I know I can't keep doing that. It really burns me up when people don't do right and I always question why. I have got to burn into my brain that some people are just bastards and they couldn't care one bit about you or the life you live. They were born bastards and they are gonna die bastards. I can't do anything but get them as far away from me as possible. I don't want to be like that, and I don't want my children to grow up to be like that. Its a strange feeling to let go of someone you were once close to. It can be heart breaking when you reminisce or it could be a sigh of release when they are finally gone. Its the latter for me. It was a sigh of relief to see him go, but the mess he made while draggin his crap out with him is something I still have to deal with. We have 2 beautiful kids and they are wonderful, but his part was played by an empty vessel filled with endless hours of xbox 360 and war games. I am happy he's gone but wish it wasn't so much mess to clean up. Did anyone deal with these issues while being separated? Please let me know what your stories are?

Cabs at Rush Hour

I thought that Cabs were supposed to stop for ladies. Ok lately I have been a little late in picking up my son and need a cab to get to him right away. What is it with these taxis. They wiz right by you with noone in the car going the direction you need to go in. I tried for over 30 minutes to hail each and every cab and they just wizzed right by and I had my child with me. I am not gonna rob you. If anything, I'll give you a better tip cause I'm in a hurry. What is the problem? Is there a number we can call if we think we are being discriminated against by cabs? Why don't they have a camera thing in there car to monitor how much they work? Are they paid by commission or hourly? I don't know, but I really want to find out. They were so rude slowing down and shaking their head, like I got on bloody clothing and a knife with a sign that said "any where" on it. I am no threat and I'm not going to east bad street. I do not get it. I thought this kind of treatment was hidden, but apparently in the taxi world, it still exists. Can we band certain cabs from patrolling our areas if they do not want to comply? Where is the justice people? Where?

Family Relationships

Now that I am seperated, my ex's family is trying to contact me via email and other avenues to inquire about the children. In my head I'm thinking, what do you want? but in my heart, I know that my kids deserve to be apart of both sides of their family even though our relationship did not work out. It's very difficult to go over their houses to spend time with them in this murky situation. I'd rather not deal with it at all, but I know time is marching by and the kids are losing moments with their other grandparents and cousins. It's strange because some people in his family have really treated me bad and others have not. I wonder should I visit the ones who are staying neutral until this situation is all resolved? The kids don't notice a difference since they didn't really visit them anyway. Since my son was diagnosed with autism, they didn't really watch him or spend time with him. I always stayed with him in case he would get to hyper or to calm him down. It's been difficult, but I've tried to stay in contact with them and away from them at the same time. Any thoughts?

Relationships

I find that I have a many personalities when it comes to men. My personality is very guarded. I don't like to give so much of myself away at first. You usually gain what little you have to get from me over time and then the rest comes naturally. After about, oh I say, 10 years of dating, I am not seeing anything from my inverting personality. Lately I have encompassed one of my other personalities (Monica) when I want to show affection and care to a man. Monica is very affectionate. She does whatever and whenever for her man. She makes up love coupons and dresses for Valentines day and wants flowers and candy and all the opposite things that I don't want. So, I have to pull Monica out when I need to show care and concern for my man.
Then, when I get pissed, my hard personality is called Niya. Niya don't play that. Niya don't take no crap. When I'm done, I'm done. That personality is just in case you mess up. That way you don't have to deal with my really hurt self. My last, but not least personality is called Sherea. Sherea will deal with everything you throw at her. She always sees the silver lining in every situation. She can be tough but very patient. She can also accept any foul habits you have and learn to look the other way. All in all, you get a pretty complete person out of me and I try to balance all the crazyness at one time. Time only will tell when you get to see all sides of me. Do you girls do this too?

A Brand New Day!

Hello,
Today I start my blog. One about relationships, family, dieting, separation, divorce, raising my ASD son and his bossy sister, trying to establish new/good relationships while keeping old ones fresh and enduring. Isn't this alot to say in one sentence. But it's bound to be good and hopefully someone will find some meaning in what I say. I know during this time in my life, I have spent countless hours trying to find my way and it would of been helpful to find someone who was in similiar shoes. Can't wait to get started.